August 13, 2013

Hearts

Great things have been happening lately, and I thank God for his gracefulness. Firstly, for the first time ever I get to go on an overseas trip with my family! It's a 8D7N trip to Bangkok and Pattaya, Thailand and I'm really looking forward to it! We've been struggling with financial problems all these while and we finally managed to settle some problems and obtained some money for a trip. It's a budget trip but I am very much grateful to be even able to travel overseas with my loved ones. God is good! :D



My parents converted to Christians when I was 8 and I just followed along without truly understanding about this whole concept. Yet I was told to attend church services and lifegroup gatherings by my parents. Feeling obliged, I followed what they've told me to do and joined these services at church but never really enjoyed it. We attended an Assemblies of God church and tongue speaking was pretty much emphasized there and I couldn't cope with that at all and I finally broke down and cried to my mom. I was lost, I didn't know why did I believed in God, what changes did that belief brought upon me. As my heart wavers, I declined any approach towards God by not attending church services, ignoring the hymns my mom loves singing and their words of advice taken from the bible teachings. It was all unmeaningful to me.

It was a heartbreaking moment for both my parents seeing that their daughter rejects salvation. Mom kept asking me the reason why I felt so and I always gave answers with twist and turns. I'm too shy to speak my feelings directly even to my own parents, haha! However, a mom always understands her child, eventually she gave me the book by Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life. It was inspiring, but it was a 30 day read and I wasn't going to do that do I stopped after about two weeks. It lifted my spirits a little higher than before but it dropped pretty quickly as well.

My grandmother came back from Canada and she wanted to attend Cantonese church services which is available at the Baptist church. My parents thought why not give another church a go and they insisted me to tag along. Of course I wasn't enthusiasted about that too and I have difficulties understanding preaches in Cantonese or Mandarin despite my Chinese speaking background as I've been receiving English education mostly. In the end I gave the English service a try and it was much better than before. But what got my spirits uplifted was an extremely inspiring read from Nick Vujicic, Life Without Limits.

I first saw that book featured by one of my favourite Youtube Gurus, Bubzbeauty and was very curious about it. I love reading and Nick's appearance caught my eye and I wanted to know more about this person. I bought the book and started reading it and as I go, thoughts reflecting on my life compared to his kept popping up in my mind. I was wondering, how could he be able to do so much when he's facing physical deficiency whereas me who's bodily perfect gets cooped up at home doing nothing much? He said to belief in ourselves and know that we have potential to do so much more than we expected, to push the limits and try things we've never thought we could achieve. But most importantly, believe that these blessings came from the God above and have faith in him at all time.

It takes a while to completely change, but I felt more love for God and have more faith in him. I used to think maybe God doesn't exist, but now I can feel that he's watching over me all the while. I put my faith in God for every hardships I face, and challenge the possibilities that would become through my prayers. I pray not just for me and my family, but for everyone which touches my heart. You see, I don't always kneel down and pray with my eyes closed with bombastic words. I pray as I'm doing something, as I'm walking, eating, breathing and sometimes even when I'm in the restroom doing my business, haha! I believe that every prayer is heard, and I'm starting to see it! I prayed for Bubz's wedding procession to be held smoothly and was glad she posted a message thanking each one of us that it was a good weather that day. And I prayed for Audrey's delivery too and was glad to see that Fighter looks healthy although he's still a premature baby. Stay strong Audrey, Timothy and Jude! <3 data-blogger-escaped-br="">


It's a very long and wordy post, but if you've read all that, I thank God that you've read it all. It's my first time that I've ever wrote out my testimony after so many years and I just wrote what came out on my mind. I'm happy to have achieve a little something though. :)

2 comments:

  1. It's great that you found something that makes you feel like there's a sense of meaning to life. I'm not a religious person, I'm actually an atheist, but I do believe that every person should have faith in something—either i religion or even in food—just as long as they're happy :)

    -nyuu
    http://lolitium.net/

    ReplyDelete
  2. nyuu- My belief in Christianity has definitely helped me in finding my own purpose in life and has been a great support to me. :)

    ReplyDelete